HISMD: Episcopal Priest

Hybrid. 2 kids - 18 & 14 yo. Partner (in office). West Hartford, CT. 48.

This "How I Structure My Day" series started with an Instagram post I made about my own life, which prompted a woman to ask if it would be possible to see how women working a more traditional, full-time job did it. I asked women to share, and, man, have people responded. The goal is to show how women from different industries, with and without kids, with and without partners, with family living with/near them and not, wfh to 1+ hour commutes, etc. structure their day. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I do!

The Snapshot

• Profession: Episcopal Priest

• Partner: Yes (My husband is a university professor and has a decent amount of flexibility with his work, in terms of where he does it. His teaching schedule, however, is rigid)

• Children: Yes, 2 kids - 18 & 14 yo.

• West Hartford, CT

• Hybrid: most M & F I WFH (or, not in “the office”), T-Th in the office. Some Saturdays; and almost always Sundays.

• 48

Typical Morning:

• Almost every morning, I wake up around 6 mostly because that’s what time my still-at-home kiddo wakes up.

• I never like getting out of bed and I set an alarm.

• Shower.

• Coffee.

• Lunch.

• Kiddo and I are out the door by 7.

• If I’m WFH, sometimes I’ll sneak in some extra sleep until 7:30, or so.

• On WFH days, if I don’t have to be anywhere, I try to get in a yoga session.

Morning "Make Life Easier" Hacks

• I have one child in college (so, no morning load, there); and my at-home child is self-sufficient in the mornings. It happens!

• I often prep my lunch/food for the next day when I’m prepping and cleaning up from dinner the night before.

• I’ll set my clothes out the night before - I’m often dressing in the dark to allow my spouse to sleep a bit longer. I’m super low maintenance when it comes to getting ready - that’s really the hack.

Transition into Work Mode

• I’m not great at this; and I think the pandemic ruined me for good.

• Right now, my buffer is being in the car and catching up with friends or listening to a podcast on my commute.

• But on WFH days, I’m straight to work in the morning; and can sometimes get caught up into the evening.

What my work day looks like

• My days are typically highly scheduled with meetings - I have weekly checkins with multiple team members.

• Any unscheduled time (no meetings) I have, I’m preparing for the very next thing - usually what’s coming up on that Sunday: writing a sermon, going over an order of service (I’m in different churches each week), preparing a presentation.

• I have to be very intentional about blocking out time for important/non-urgent things, and I’m better and worse at that depending on, well, my schedule. Shout out to Kelly’s work for helping me continue to chip away at this approach.

• I often have evening meetings, but more and more folks can meet during the day.

• Tues-Thurs our staff tends to eat lunch together, which is really wonderful; and every Wednesday, we worship together.

• Mondays and Fridays might include coffee or lunch with a colleague.

• Almost every week, I meet for an hour with my very close girlfriends who are also clergy.

Lunch/Snacks

• When I’m in the office, I take a not insignificant amount of food to get me through the day so that I’m sure I’m eating what best fuels my body (and don’t spend extra money on take out). But, I typically take 30 minutes, sometimes an hour, for lunch.

Breaks

• Besides lunch, I don’t. Again, I think the pandemic ruined me in this effort.

Leaving work

• I work 7:30am-4:30pm at least every day; but, typically have evening meetings.

• About once a week - give or take - I return to non-meeting work after dinner.

• I will often have scheduled events on Saturdays; and while I try really hard not to crack open my laptop, I typically spend a couple of hours “plugged in” on Saturdays.

• And Sunday mornings/early afternoons are often booked.

Transition out of work mode

• Many days, I am able to catch a yoga session as soon as I get home, before beginning my evening at home.

• Change clothes, yoga, quick walk with my spouse, dinner, watch a show with my family, read.

After work/evening hours

• Some combination of working, relaxing, tending to household needs.

• My kiddo doesn’t go to bed until 10, and I feel committed to staying up until he goes to bed (I still tuck him in!). That doesn’t happen every night, but most nights it does. And my college kiddo is often ready to text later in the evening/midnight. That’s been an adjustment. And - no lie - I can dig in to bedtime procrastination revenge with the best of ‘em.

• Usually something as brainless as possible (I’m hooked on The Equalizer right now - Queen Latifah is everything).

• I try to play the piano once a week or so for a stretch.

• I may do laundry.

• If I’m lucky, I can convince my kiddo to play a game with me (if you don’t have Mastermind, go get it - great for older kiddos).

• Tonight, I’m doing our taxes! I’ll alternate between a good show and reading. Every evening is different based on what needs to happen and my energy level.

Evening Non-Negotiables

• Have in mind what I’m eating the next day and what I’m wearing the next day. Other than that, not much.

Afternoon/evening “make life smoother” tips

• Everything always goes better if I’ve prayed, done yoga, gone for a walk or played the piano. Admittedly, I can get caught scrolling for too long, but not often. I’ve been telling myself more and more to go to sleep when I feel tired. Which must sound insane and counterintuitive. But, I’ve pushed through that for so many years for various reasons. And sometimes, I use the Calm app to help that along (feeling tired and falling asleep).

Sharing the load with a partner

• We share a lot of the load for tangible things, although he takes on the bulk of the cooking load. The mental load (what’s next and how do we plan for it) and the scheduling load falls mostly to me.

Things you do for fun/during the week

• I’d say this mostly happens in small ways. I talk to friends nearly every day, and find that life-giving, certainly. And I don’t take myself too seriously and work with some great folks in ministry. Few days go by that I don’t laugh. But, admittedly, I don’t get a chance to socialize as much as I’d like. Work takes a lot of my energy - I don’t have much left.

Exercise/Body Movement

• It’s yoga for me - almost every day! And relatively frequent walks.

Outsourcing

• None

Anything Else the Sharer Wants to Share

• I don’t have much wisdom to share, here; but I take time every day to offer gratitude and lean into my faith, which assures me that I don’t have to handle everything on my own. And I gave up worrying for Lent last year, and it’s mostly stuck. I highly recommend!

• One tangible thing I did a few years ago: even though I keep a digital calendar for everything, I hung a paper calendar up in the kitchen with evening commitments for everyone and appointments that don’t happen every day (lessons, drs appts, etc). That keeps the kids in the know on which grownup will or won’t be home on any given evening. And a quick glance at least provides some info about whether a sleepover or weekday social gathering is feasible.

That’s a wrap for this one!

Thank you so much to this woman for generously sharing. These publish every Thursday!

A reminder of the ground rules to ensure women continue wanting to share about their days and feel safe doing so.

• Encouraging comments always welcome!

• If you have questions or even hang-ups about what someone shared, you are welcome to ask a question for the sharer in the same kind, genuinely curious way you would if you were looking at that woman in her eyes. She might respond through me.

• If comments are judge-y or mean-spirited, I reserve the right to delete comments. I can handle being criticized about my own work here (and even still, to a degree – I’m also a person), but I go into full mama bear mode when people come after my people – including women who are being vulnerable and sharing in the first place.

• Thanks to the vast majority of people who are so kind!

New here? Welcome!

I’m Kelly Nolan, an attorney-turned-time management strategist and mom of two. I teach the Bright Method, a realistic time management system designed for professional working women. In addition to this fun new series, I share bite-sized time management strategies on Instagram. Thanks for being here!

After experiencing overwhelm as a young patent litigator in Boston, I figured out a time management system to help me show up in the ways that I wanted to at work and at home – without requiring my brain to somehow magically remember it all. I now teach other professional working women how to manage their personal, family, and career roles with less stress and more calm clarity using realistic time management strategies. My system, the Bright Method, has been featured in Bloomberg Businessweek, and my work has been published in Forbes, Fast Company, Business Insider, and more. Learn more on my website, come learn bite-sized strategies with me on Instagram, or jump into my free 5-day program.

Need help finding more articles?

Click here to go to the HISMD index!

Know a friend who might love this, too?

Send it to your friend – or the whole group chat!

Thanks for being here!