HISMD: Qualifying Broker/Realtor

4 kids (17, 15, 13 & 8). Partner (In office - 7-5 with flexibility). Hybrid (in office during school hours but home during summer/school breaks). Southeast. Mid-40's.

This "How I Structure My Day" series started with an Instagram post I made about my own life, which prompted a woman to ask if it would be possible to see how women working a more traditional, full-time job did it. I asked women to share, and, man, have people responded. The goal is to show how women from different industries, with and without kids, with and without partners, with family living with/near them and not, wfh to 1+ hour commutes, etc. structure their day. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I do!

The Snapshot

• Partner: Yes (In office - 7-5 with flexibility)

• Children: Yes – 17, 15, 13, 8

• Southeast

• Hybrid - I tend to work from the office during school hours but home during summer/school breaks

• Mid 40’s

Typical Morning:

• Alarm goes off at 5:15am. I start the coffee, move the load from the washing machine to the dryer, start a new load in the washer, then get in the shower.

• After I shower, I wake up my children, typically in birth order.

  • My oldest needs to be woken up several times so I start with her.

  • My 2nd and 3rd pop up and gets dressed.

  • I go check on my oldest before waking my youngest and helping her come down to my room to get dressed.

  • Before going back downstairs, I check on my oldest one more time to make sure she is out of bed.

• I then go downstairs and do my hair and makeup while making sure my youngest is getting herself dressed and her teeth/hair brushed.

• When we have finished this, I fix her breakfast, pack her lunch, snack, water bottle and after school bag (if needed). The other three make their own breakfast and pack their own lunches/after school sports equipment.

• While they are eating, I finish getting dressed.

• I grab my coffee to go and then we are out the door!

• My oldest drives herself and leaves the house at 7:00am.

• I still like to take the other three to school. It may be counterproductive, but it isn't too far from my office, and I enjoy the time in the car with them. We leave the house at 6:55am.

Morning "Make Life Easier" Hacks

• Now that mine are older, they do a lot for themselves, but they still have to be reminded to do it!

• We typically review the schedule for the next day to make sure everyone knows who is picking them up from after-school activities.

• I also like to start the dishwasher and washing machine before bed.

Transition into Work Mode

• When I work from home it's difficult. However, most of my clients are my peers, so they understand that my kids are around.

What my work day looks like

• I am fortunate to be in a position that I make my own schedule. I don't have strict office hours, so I typically work during school hours. That also gives me the flexibility to attend school functions, volunteer, do part-time work, and manage my kids' after-school activities.

• My personal obligations go into my calendar as appointments, so when scheduling work appointments I don't have conflicts. If someone requests an appointment during a time I've already scheduled something personal, carpool for example, then I just say I already have an appointment during that time, just as I would if I had another work obligation.

• As a realtor, if I'm not working I'm not making money, but I made the decision to sacrifice a guaranteed income instead of sacrificing time away from my family. I feel much happier and more fulfilled being more involved with my kids than being overwhelmed and busy with work.

Lunch/Snacks

• If I'm working in office then I will usually take a late lunch. I run home to eat and change clothes just before afternoon carpool.

Breaks

• I am not tied to a desk so this is not necessary!

Leaving work

• If working from the office or not in appointments, I usually leave the office at 1pm to run home and eat lunch and change clothes before going to afternoon carpool. I can work from my car if necessary.

Transition out of work mode

• I set clear boundaries and expectations with my clients from the beginning. I tell them that my phone goes on "Do not disturb" every night at 8:30pm. I may, or may not, check my phone after that time, but I will always get back to them the next morning after 8am. I make it clear that there are no emergencies in real estate and everything can be handled during business hours! And that's the truth- if your house is burning down, I can't do anything for you but sympathize, so please call 911 and not me!

• The agents in my office are all working mothers, so they typically don't call after hours unless they are up against a deadline and have a question.

• I think that changing out of my work clothes and into comfortable clothes before carpool helps me mentally transition back into mom mode. I'm more comfortable, so I'm more relaxed when I'm shuffling kids from school to sports to home.

After work/evening hours

• With four active kids, my husband and I are usually splitting time between different sports practices in the afternoon.

• Our oldest drives herself home, but she also has sports practices, takes dance, and babysits after school.

• I pick up the other three from school at 2:45.

• Our 3rd always has a sport after school, so I take #2 and #4 home.

• I will get my youngest a snack and started on her homework.

• Our second does not do any after school activities, so she has more chores around the house. She will unload the dishwasher and fold a load of laundry before helping me prep dinner.

• My husband will pick up #3 on his way home from work.

• Two or three nights a week, sometimes five during the spring, we have evening sports practices or games, so my husband and I divide and conquer!

• Once we are home for the evening, I clean up the kitchen, start the dishwasher, start a load in the laundry, and set up the coffee pot for the next morning.

• Our youngest is the only one who needs to be managed at bed time, so once she has been tucked in we typically watch a show or two and then go to bed.

Evening Non-Negotiables

• I learned years ago to stop leaving all of our laundry for the weekends. I have to do one or two loads a day otherwise I have to work from home on Monday and do it because our weekends are just to busy to do it all, and then I'm not as productive in other areas. So, I start one load every morning and one load every evening.

Afternoon/evening “make life smoother” tips

• We try to meal plan based on how busy our afternoon/evenings are that week. For example, if we know we will be at the ball park late one night then I plan for a crock pot meal or something easy like baked potatoes & salad, spaghetti or tacos that our 15 year old can make.

• If we have a night with no games/activities then I plan something that requires me or my husband like grilled chicken or steak, etc.

• Also, as I mentioned, I do really turn my phone on "do not disturb" automatically at 8:30pm every night. I have my mom, sister, husband, and children set on "breakthrough" just in case of emergencies, but everyone else goes unanswered until the next day. This allows me to put my phone on the charger and ignore it until I'm ready to look at it again the next day.

Sharing the load with a partner

• I am lucky. I really am. My husband is a great partner and father, and really does as much as he can to help at home. I bear the brunt, and do all of the financial/life management things, but he is a huge help with home chores and managing our kids' schedules.

• Over the course of our marriage, we have taken turns being the one with the flexible schedule. When I could not do, he did. Now that I'm more flexible I do more, but he respects that when I'm called to an appointment after hours that he will need to pick up the slack.

Things you do for fun/you during the week

• This is going to sound cheesy and like I'm blowing smoke, but my fun right now is watching my kids do what they love in their sports and activities. My dream was always to be a mom. I work because we need me to. I don't really have any hobbies, so I truly love just watching my kids in their activities.

Exercise/Body Movement

• I should, but I hate exercising, so I'm not good at making time for it. That was a goal for this summer, but I'm failing!

Outsourcing

• We have a lawn service, but all other home chores, including cleaning the pool, we do ourselves... with the help of our kids!

Anything Else the Sharer Wants to Share

• I took your free course in 2020 and have been using a modified version of the Bright Method ever since. My husband and three older children can all see our shared Google calendars (I don't share my work or personal items and neither does my husband unless it affects everyone), so the mental load of the schedule is shared.

• I also keep a written calendar on the kitchen counter that I updated weekly. It is color coded like the digital calendar, but this helps my youngest know where everyone is any given afternoon.

• This is also where I write down the meal plan so there isn't the "what's for dinner" question every afternoon.

• Life really got busier this school year with two in multiple Varsity sports, so we sat our kids down to make sure they understood that their help around the house was expected and required. They chip in with dishes, laundry, cleaning and cooking. They sometimes have to be nudged, but they know that we can't make it all happen without them!

That’s a wrap for this one!

Thank you so much to this woman for generously sharing. These publish every Thursday!

A reminder of the ground rules to ensure women continue wanting to share about their days and feel safe doing so.

• Encouraging comments always welcome!

• If you have questions or even hang-ups about what someone shared, you are welcome to ask a question for the sharer in the same kind, genuinely curious way you would if you were looking at that woman in her eyes. She might respond through me.

• If comments are judge-y or mean-spirited, I reserve the right to delete comments. I can handle being criticized about my own work here (and even still, to a degree – I’m also a person), but I go into full mama bear mode when people come after my people – including women who are being vulnerable and sharing in the first place.

• Thanks to the vast majority of people who are so kind!

New here? Welcome!

I’m Kelly Nolan, an attorney-turned-time management strategist and mom of two. I teach the Bright Method, a realistic time management system designed for professional working women.

After experiencing overwhelm as a young patent litigator in Boston, I figured out a time management system to help me show up in the ways that I wanted to at work and at home – without requiring my brain to somehow magically remember it all. I now teach other professional working women how to manage their personal, family, and career roles with less stress and more calm clarity using realistic time management strategies. My system, the Bright Method, has been featured in Bloomberg Businessweek, and my work has been published in Forbes, Fast Company, Business Insider, and more. Learn more on my website, listen to the Bright Method podcast, come learn bite-sized strategies with me on Instagram, or jump into my free 5-day program.

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