Thank you for this wonderful compilation! Does anybody else feel like things have gotten harder, not easier, as they’ve emerged from babyhood? When I was postpartum, it was simple: do the bare minimum to survive. Now that I have a 2.5 year old, it’s more nuanced—I care deeply about my work, but it no longer my top or only priority, my time is limited, and I’m looking to build sustainable practices.
It's such a great point and question. Extremes – i.e., the no-kid-so-can-work-more life and the baby-bare-minimum-survival period – in some ways are easier to operate within because there's clarity. When you regain more freedom (and some more energy from hopefully sleeping more), but not total freedom, finding a middle ground is tricky. It requires you (and still tired you) to figure out how much you want to give to work, how to prioritize within that limited capacity, etc. – all while the capacity shifts due to your needs, kid needs, and work demands. And also while the workload shifts because... well, email and projects keep coming. So, to add to the complication, there's no "figure it out and then set it and forget it" option (annoyingly) because it all keeps shifting.
Here's where I land: the goal can't be to find the "right" new setup. The goal is to be able to find and re-find the middle ground option (of which there are many) you want to land on whenever life shifts. It's to find a way to have clarity among the shifting to be able to decide and adjust. For me, it's the Bright Method – it helps me have clarity around my capacity and workload and think through how I want my life to feel (in the short term and long term) – and then have a system to use to make changes (sometimes big, sometimes small adjustments) to get there. For me, it's the tool that helps me build the sustainable approach (which can vary by season), if that makes sense. Whether you use the Bright Method or something else, I think that's the key to sustainability here – less about landing on the right balance and more about having a means to keep being able to read the current reality and adjust to finding a sustainable approach, if needed, throughout life's ebbs and flows.
Very curious what others think. Figured I'd just weigh in with where my brain goes.
I was going to say -- I have an 11 year old and a 14 year old. I need a "hacks compilation" like this for being a working parent at that phase. Running here and there with activities, need to preserve energy and mental bandwidth to deal with tween/teen issues. For me, it feels much harder than when they were younger. Also, I'm older now. I'm tired!!!!
All very valid, and I work with many women in the same boat – you're not alone! I'll work on it. In addition, feel free to check out the main series I publish here ("How I Structure My Day"), which is a series featuring anonymous women. In particular, check out the index and search by Older Kids to see shares by moms with older kids. Some of their tips might help in the meantime!
Thank you for this wonderful compilation! Does anybody else feel like things have gotten harder, not easier, as they’ve emerged from babyhood? When I was postpartum, it was simple: do the bare minimum to survive. Now that I have a 2.5 year old, it’s more nuanced—I care deeply about my work, but it no longer my top or only priority, my time is limited, and I’m looking to build sustainable practices.
It's such a great point and question. Extremes – i.e., the no-kid-so-can-work-more life and the baby-bare-minimum-survival period – in some ways are easier to operate within because there's clarity. When you regain more freedom (and some more energy from hopefully sleeping more), but not total freedom, finding a middle ground is tricky. It requires you (and still tired you) to figure out how much you want to give to work, how to prioritize within that limited capacity, etc. – all while the capacity shifts due to your needs, kid needs, and work demands. And also while the workload shifts because... well, email and projects keep coming. So, to add to the complication, there's no "figure it out and then set it and forget it" option (annoyingly) because it all keeps shifting.
Here's where I land: the goal can't be to find the "right" new setup. The goal is to be able to find and re-find the middle ground option (of which there are many) you want to land on whenever life shifts. It's to find a way to have clarity among the shifting to be able to decide and adjust. For me, it's the Bright Method – it helps me have clarity around my capacity and workload and think through how I want my life to feel (in the short term and long term) – and then have a system to use to make changes (sometimes big, sometimes small adjustments) to get there. For me, it's the tool that helps me build the sustainable approach (which can vary by season), if that makes sense. Whether you use the Bright Method or something else, I think that's the key to sustainability here – less about landing on the right balance and more about having a means to keep being able to read the current reality and adjust to finding a sustainable approach, if needed, throughout life's ebbs and flows.
Very curious what others think. Figured I'd just weigh in with where my brain goes.
I was going to say -- I have an 11 year old and a 14 year old. I need a "hacks compilation" like this for being a working parent at that phase. Running here and there with activities, need to preserve energy and mental bandwidth to deal with tween/teen issues. For me, it feels much harder than when they were younger. Also, I'm older now. I'm tired!!!!
All very valid, and I work with many women in the same boat – you're not alone! I'll work on it. In addition, feel free to check out the main series I publish here ("How I Structure My Day"), which is a series featuring anonymous women. In particular, check out the index and search by Older Kids to see shares by moms with older kids. Some of their tips might help in the meantime!
These are AMAZING! Thank you for compiling such a helpful resource!!
Thank you for the kind note. Easy – I love learning from women here and on Instagram!